X-Envelope-To: Return-Path: From: "Bobby Norton" Subject: Re: Homepage Review Date: Wed, 22 Jul 1998 18:46:44 -0400 Your Homepage is Fucked. Tis my vision to ensure such fucked up minds as yours are removed from the fucking gene pool. That fucking Dot is fast.......can't catch the fucker. Continue the Fucked up humor on your Fucking webpage....just fucking use protection while ....Fuc....having sex. Dont want any other little fuckers with your fucking fucked up mind out there running around. Jorgon P.S. Dont fucking ask me how in the hell I found your Homepage....if you have a reply to my statements of opinion....BITE ME! yea yea, I say that too a lot and not just because it was on your fucking homepage. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: "Bobby Norton" From: Subject: Re: Homepage Review Yes, we try at all times to maintain a polite and respectable tone of conversation. The word fuck is terribly offensive to the ear, but somehow.. I have the urge.. to scream... "FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"! at you. I am horribly sorry for this intrusion upon your sanity. My soul weeps tears for your impending salvation. Curious, also, am I, as to how you managed to wind up perusing the dreary contents of my miserable website. Obedient, I am not. Hence, I ask. In good faith The Meister of All Things Dull and Unentertaining. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- X-Envelope-To: Return-Path: From: "Bobby Norton" Subject: Re: Homepage Review Date: Thu, 23 Jul 1998 23:51:21 -0400 Some things in this Universe were meant to never be explained. The Curse of King Tut, the bermuda triangle, or perhaps the ingredients of Spam. I rank the trek I pursued that eventually pinacled at the once-overing of your vulgar, meddle-testing media as perhaps the lowest moment of my life. As I was reading the words of your pitiful excuse for a homepage, I realized that I had indeed reached the bottom of all society. I could go no further down, for indeed I had to clear the pond scum from my nostrils to even breathe. A moment of realization, a flash of hope occured at this most horrible of times. I realized, no matter what I ever did or said....I would never have to take credit for that homepage. Of course, I thought, I am sure there is worse out there......ones with less humor, ones that are fake. And in all honestly, I would prefer the 5 minutes wasted on reading you page far more than reading about 80% of the pervsion and trash that is so commonly associated with the glorious World Wide Web. ((80% because the masculine side of me can not deny the attraction of a beautiful face or the curve of a shapely figure, for me, there is art in every picture, I just have to be open minded enough to see it)) But alas, I digress. I write this letter simply to tell you, there is no possible combination of facts and figures to describe what brought me to your webpage.....only one saying can hint at the truth....I share that with you now. Put 100,000 monkeys on 100,000 typewriters and eventually one will type the FUCKING Declaration of Independence. -Someone I forgot who was, but shall forever be In an attempt to fully regain the time lost on your webpage and seek utter revenge, I ask that the combined reading of this email and the other plus an additional 1 minute spent contemplating the exsistence of a truly great cup of coffee be accepted by you as fair punishment. I ask that you follow through on these terms so that the universe may once again rest in harmony. If not, the payback shall indeed, be hell. Have a great Day....... Jorgon ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: "Bobby Norton" From: Subject: Re: Homepage Review Do you smoke a lot of weed? -----------------------------------------------------------------------------